The Kids Jokes Page

This page is dedicated to kids jokes; the excruciating puns that make kids howl and adults groan. In fact, this is probably where Christmas crackers get their inspiration!

How did the Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code

Who looks after spooks on airplanes?

Air Ghostesses!

What is red, wobbles and flies?

A JellyCopter

"How's the boy who swallowed the quarter, nurse?"

"No change yet!"

"Why can't a bicycle stand up?"

"Its two tyred!"

"Where did they sign the Declaration of Independence?"

"At the bottom!"

"What's worse than raining cats and dogs?"

"Hailing taxis!"

"What do hedgehogs like to eat?"

"Prickled onions!"

"Why do bees have sticky hair?"

"They use honey combs!"

"What's tall, wobbles and is found in Paris?"

"The Trifle Tower!"

"How do Arabs dance?"

"Sheikh to Sheikh!"

"What's black, floats on water and shouts 'knickers'?"

"Crude Oil!"

"What lives under water, has two guns and wears a cowboy hat?"

"Billy the Squid!"

"What's is black and white and red all over?"

"A sunburnt Zebra!"

"Why do storks only lift one leg?"

"Because they'd fall over if they lifted both of them!"

"What do you call a large animal that always thinks its ill?"

"A Hippo-chondriac!"

"Have you heard the joke about quicksand?"

"It took a long time to sink in!"

"What do rich turtles wear?"

"People necked sweaters!"

"How do you start a flea race?"

"One, two, flea, go!"

"What's yellow, black and dangerous?"

"Shark infected custard!"

Think you can do better? Sure you can! Why not email your joke for inclusion in our visitors section to us at jokes@makeemlaugh.com. Please email jokes with your name and state or country for publication. Please let us have you name, address and telephone number (not for publication) and your email address indicating if you would like us to publish it with your joke!